now this is the story all about how
my life got flip-turned upside-down
now I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there.
I'll tell ya how I became a guy with serious issues!
when I was young I loved Sonic teh deathhog 666 edition on my Book of Genesis. I would pray to Sonic every night, thanking him for the life he had given me. "Sonic is love" I'd say, "Gotta go fasts." my dad hears me and jizzles all over the floor. Suddenly I'm 35 cleaning out the attic. I found my old Genesis Buttsadly, no Sonic deth raep 666 edgy anywhere
I call up my friend, lets call him A Dirty Bitch, asking if I could borrow all of his money. He said no I passed it off as a glitch and stabbed him and took all his money. I used it to buy a copy of sonic off Craig's List from a guy called "666LUFFASIRRISAFFUL666." real legit, I know. Anyway after 81727595949195783716 years of waiting, I recieved a package from The UPS Man. I slapped it around a bit and he gave me a box. It was the game. It had a cover. I passed it off as a glitch and kept going. I put the game in the Book of Genesis and the title screen appeared. It was a little odd. There was a single pixel out in my TV. I smacked it with an aluminum bat and pressed start. The level music was normal and so was sonic. I passed it off as a glitch and kept going. Soon I beat the final level. A cutscene happened. eggman said, in the form of a speech bubble, "GOSH DANG IT SONIC!!!" Sonic replied: "YUR SUCH A SNERDBURGLAR EGGMUN!" He jumped on him and he fell down. I burned the game. The next morning it reappeared in the form of melted plastic in the same spot as the place I burned it. I freaked out and killed myself. I'm dead. WHATATWEEST